Intro for Former Members

Ex-Family members are unique. In fact, it might be said that there are as many different kinds of former members as there are former members. It would therefore be unhelpful to attempt to categorise anyone who used to be a member of the Family. Nonetheless, there are several remarkably different viewpoints held in common by former members, and as these contrast dramatically with each other, it is worthwhile talking about each of them in turn.

These are, of course, broad generalisations and there are obviously many people who won’t ‘fit’ anywhere. However, regarding former members’ attitudes towards Christianity, there are:

Former members who’ve rejected all Christianity, others who cling to fond memories of the Family, and then there are those who reject the Family, but who retain their faith as Christians.

This page provides a short introduction specifically to each of these groups, explaining the purpose for Make Straight Paths.

Those who’ve rejected all Christianity.

Some former members have pretty much rejected all Christianity. This may or may not be due to their Family experience, and in fact there are probably a great many contributing factors. Many people have simply taken the attitude that “If what I saw in the Family is Christianity, then I don’t want it.”

If this is you, and you have accidentally stumbled onto this web site, then there are a couple of things that we should point out to you. First, this web site is unashamedly Christian. As such, the authors begin their writings from the presupposition that the Bible is the true, revealed Word of God, used to measure all truth and all error. This site does not attempt to prove the existence of God or the authenticity of the Bible. Both are assumed true.

Second − and this is important − the authors hold that there are vast differences between true Christianity and the particular version of Christianity as displayed in the Family. The primary difference is that true Christianity stands on the Bible alone as the standard of authority by which all other writings must be measured. In the Family, however, it is a fundamental principle that official Family writings are also the word of God. In fact, as Family writings are seen as the current, up-to-date word of God, they are given precedence over that which is written in the Bible. Therefore, when there is a conflict between Family writings and the Bible, Family members are taught to believe Family writings above the Bible, certain sections of which are often seen as not being relevant for today. The direct result of this foundational difference can be seen in the other major contrast between the Family and Christianity. There are numerous Family interpretations and doctrines that are at odds with Christianity. Some of these may be minor, others have had tremendous impact on the lives of Family members. This web site examines many such Family doctrines in light of the Bible.

Third, as Christians, the authors proclaim that God is Lord of all. He is sovereign Lord of each life and will ultimately see justice on earth. This means specifically that He must and He will call each one to account. If you suffered harm in the Family, He will address it. However, He is under no obligation to act according to our timing or according to what we think is fair. If He did, He would not be God. Eventually we will all face Him. As former Family members, the authors likewise declare their own shock at the realisation that the group to which they gave their lives falls far short of the true biblical standard. They believe that Family membership itself is something to be repented of. Because we believe the Bible, we also believe that Christianity is no Family-style easy-believism. The ‘say a little prayer with me and you’ll be saved forever no matter how you live’ Christianity is not in the Bible. Neither, of course, is the ‘I’ll try to be good and it should be enough for God’ attitude. This web site will probably not convince you of Christianity. All we can say is that we believe God is real, He answers honest prayer in the way He chooses, and He is very different from how He was portrayed in the Family. Does He love you? He died that He may save you from your sins. And that, of course, is the corollary to the above statements on God’s justice: your suffering at the hands of the Family does not exonerate you from your own sins. But that’s another story.

If you’re still interested, you might like to read the three articles on the nature of God: Where is God, Who is Jesus? and Jesus the Lover.

Those who cling to fond memories of TF

The second group of ex-members consists of those who’ve left the Family, but who look back on their time with fond memories. If this is you, it is possible that you did not experience any abuse, maybe you formed some good friendships, had some happy times. Maybe you still read the MLs. If that’s the case you might be worried that as this site is run by ex-members, it will be full of vitriolic attacks on particular Family leaders or on the Family itself. If it’s any consolation, this website focuses on the Bible, not on people in the Family. In fact, the only times that Berg/Dad is mentioned are when it’s unavoidable, or to state clearly that he is the originator of a particular interpretation or practice.

There are a couple of issues that should be mentioned, though. First, it is often said that ‘not everything that happened in the Family was bad,’ and ‘not everything in the MLs is wrong.’ These statements are true enough, and it is certainly not the purpose of this website to prove that every Family member was/is either abused or an abuser, or that every word that Berg/Dad wrote was wrong. On the other hand, it is the position of the authors of this site that there were fundamental errors in his theology, which resulted in a lot of serious misinterpretation and harmful misapplication of Scripture. It is important to understand that these are fundamental concepts. We’re not talking about little details or relatively unimportant issues. For example, sure, too much white sugar is bad for you. Probably, those in authority should promote healthy diets. Possibly, they should take steps to discourage too much junk food. It is highly debatable whether they should demand obedience to dietary rules. These, however, are all details within the big picture and have no relevance to the question of whether or not the Family writings against white sugar actually originated from God or from man. That is a different question altogether. It is the position of the authors of this site, as mentioned above, that it is the Bible alone that measures truth or error. It is the Bible alone that contains the words of God. It is the Bible that must be used to measure each and every ML. Any ML that contradicts the Bible must be discarded. This is one of the foundational concepts on which this website is built. Anything you read here will have been written with that presupposition in mind.

Next, some former members point to the ‘good fruit’ of the Family, the souls saved, lives changed, phenomenal witness and so on. Doesn’t that count for something? As pointed out above, the Bible does not support the easy-believism of the quick salvation prayer that saves souls for eternity. This doctrine is examined in detail in Salvation. A pertinent question might be: How many of the people who prayed the salvation prayer actually repented from their sins and thus exhibited a changed life? Unfortunately this would probably negate the majority of the Family’s salvation statistics. Further, most of the other ex-member websites detail a lot of ‘bad fruit’ directly resulting from the Family. In fact, there are so many allegations of criminal activity that it would be exceedingly unwise to discount it all. The point is that when there are testimonies of both extreme good and extreme bad occurring in the same group, it may be wise to investigate further before coming to a conclusion.

Finally, please remember that the ends do not justify the means. Sin is still sin even if you have a good motive, or good is somehow produced along the way. Good works are the result of a life yielded to God, but that does not mean that good works prove that the doer is godly. When Jesus said that we would know the difference between true and false prophets in Matt 7:15-20, He did not say that it would always be easy to figure it out. In fact, in Matthew 24, He warns four times of the prevalence of deceivers (Matt 24:4,5,11,24). In plain words, someone’s ‘good’ actions do not prove the truth of their doctrine, especially if they are also being accused of ‘bad’ actions. James says that both good and bad fruit proceeding from the same source generally indicates that the source is bad, not good (James 3:10-12). The truth of a doctrine cannot be seen from the actions of someone who believes it. That can only be seen by how it measures up against the Bible.

A good place to start would probably be the studies on what actually is the Word of God: The Word of God, The Standard of Measurement and Unity in Bible Interpretation.

Those who reject TF but who retain their faith.

Relearning the Bible is a long, hard process. It is difficult work for anyone to try to come to terms with deep biblical truths, and then attempt to apply them to modern life. That job is dramatically compounded when you’ve spent many years learning things the wrong way, and you might not even have any idea which things need to be ‘unlearned’. If this is you, you might find this site helpful, not because the authors wish to teach you the ‘correct’ interpretation, but because the pages here are the result of their own journey. They chewed over these thorny issues primarily because they wanted to get answers for themselves. You may or may not agree with their conclusions, but you will see a side to the Bible that never existed in the Family.

A good place to start might be the series written on how to study the Bible:

Basic Bible Interpretation, The Bible Student and Proof-texting.

Finally, this web site does not address issues of abuse, criminal activity, or any legal claims against the Family. If you are interested in these questions, you should go to the exFamily website.

It is our prayer that this site will be a blessing to you. If you have any comments or suggestions we welcome your input via our ‘contact us’ page.

Happy reading!

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